I want more. For me. For you. For us.
I slouched in the wicker chair in our dining room, arms crossed, face tense, indignant and emotional, as I often am. My feelings and words collided and I think I saw sparks as truth came rolling out of my mouth. Before I even realized what I was saying the words were there, part rage, part sadness, part excitement.
I want to do more than help women exist in a smaller body!
My eyes grew large as if I had discovered something special, magical, beautiful. Because I had. I had discovered one of my truths. My current why. Part of my purpose.
There it is. That is what I want to do.
I ran into the kitchen to jot down this truth, so it wouldn't slip from my brain, never to be found again, as so many things do these days.
This is not to say that I don't love helping educate people on nutrition and exercise to live better, healthier lives in bodies that feel really great and allow them to do all sorts of amazing things... because I do. As time passes, I am less and less interested in spending my time supporting the loss of those "pesky last five pounds." The five pounds that consume you and take up far too much of your headspace, time and energy. I want more. More for me, more for you, and more for women.
My truth, my why, my purpose has evolved with me, and with my business. As the years pass and I garner wisdom, perspective and experience, I am hit with realizations about what I want for myself, for my work, and the amazing women I have the privilege of working with.
Our society has lied to us. For years they have told us that as women, in order to have worth and value, we must be small. We must make our bodies look a certain way. At any cost.
They have told us that health and happiness look one way...like thinness. Very smart and influential women lie to us about the way to get "your best body." They convince us that our bodies are not good enough, in order to sell us things we might not want, and definitely don't need, to feed their pockets, and the lie that women are here to be looked at... seen and not heard. That we must fit the mold, that we must embrace and conform to their rigid standards of beauty. At any cost.
Just like the great MLK had a dream, so do I.
I dream of a world where powerful and brave women rise up to lead in order to spark positive change.
I dream of a world...
Where women support and encourage one another.
Where the contributions of women are equally respected and we are compensated as such.
Where, without asking, or fighting, or demanding, we have a seat at the table, a spot on the stage, and a place on the podium. Because we have earned it.
Where we are seen as equal contributors regardless of race, gender, color, or size.
Where we eat like we love ourselves, move like we love ourselves, speak like we love ourselves and act like we love ourselves.
Where we understand that we have worth and value and that goes far beyond what we look like.
Where we face the things that scare us, because that is where we discover how brave we truly are. And courage, is a muscle. The more we flex it, the stronger it gets.
Where we eat food that nourishes our one amazing body.
Where we practice love and gratitude for our bodies, despite how we look or feel in that moment.
Where we love our bodies to a better, healthier place, understanding that health is not one dimensional. A healthy body is no good without a healthy mind, healthy thoughts and healthy relationships, with ourself and with others.
Where we practice kindness towards each other, and ourselves.
Where we make choices that serve us, even when it will piss someone else off.
Where we make ourselves a priority.
Where we can say no. And give no reason, explanation or apology.
Where we shed the shame and the guilt that is keeping us small and silent and so very alone.
Where we live honestly, not filtered and edited, knowing that vulnerability connects us to others.
Where we live with attention and intention, focusing on the things that really matter... to us.
These things can happen when we shed the old story that we are our bodies and write a new story. These things can happen when we stop believing the lies and instead show up to do great things... scary things, brave things, hard things, regardless of how we feel in our body today. A body that has carried us through our life and through every day so far. Every good, bad, horrific, sad, joyful, happy and hard day... it has carried us through.
I have a dream. It is a dream I work to turn into a reality every day in order to help women live bravely and powerfully in whatever body they have today. Because we are so much more than our bodies, and we have so much to offer this world.
You are so much more than beautiful.
You are so much more than your body.
Your outward appearance is just the home that protects your beautiful heart and your incredible brain.
-Dana Suchow