This May Tuff Girl turned 14. In years past we have celebrated with a DJ, snacks and coffee, fresh new apparel, and a day long celebration in the gym. This years anniversary came and went and while I had my own private moment of acknowledgement and pride, I did not do anything with our gym community. This year, that is what felt best to me.

For those of you who are new here, May is a particularly hard month for me and my family. Five years ago, on May 10, our middle daughter Lea died from a rare form of brain cancer called DIPG. Her birthday is also in May, and this year, on May 25 she should have turned twelve.

For the first four years after her death I put on a brave face and celebrated, despite how low I was— despite the depths of my grief and despair. This year, I allowed it to look different.

I want to acknowledge fourteen brutiful (beautiful+brutal) years of Tuff Girl and thank so many of you for being a part of our community. Whether you were there for a week, a month or every bit of our 14 years, you have played a part in our success and our ability to help people feel strong, capable and powerful in their bodies, minds and lives. Thank you so much.

At Tuff Girl we encourage you to “come as you are” and sometimes that is a hard thing to do.

Often times we tell ourselves that if we can’t do what we did last week, last month or last year, then we should do nothing.

We tell ourselves that if we don’t feel great physically or emotionally, we shouldn’t show up.

Some days we believe the lies of our inner critic. Some days those negative voices are so loud and they drown out the truth.

Life is hard. You will face hardships and pain and grief and things that you might feel unable to handle… things that feel impossible even.

You are allowed to show up sad and angry and mad and hurt and frustrated and anxious and unsure.

You are also allowed to change, and to make a different choice day to day, week to week, and year to year.

You, your body, your goals, your life, the things that you want… they change. They shift as we grow and evolve and age. They change as we have new experiences (both good and bad) and form new perspectives based on those experiences. You are allowed to change. Allow yourself to change. You are allowed to want different things. Allow yourself to do it differently. You are allowed to set new goals and develop new relationships with your body, food and exercise. Let go of the goals you set ten years ago— you are not that person anymore.

You are allowed to let go of relationships and events that are no longer serving you and say “not anymore.”

You are the most important thing. Keep prioritizing yourself and keep showing up. Even when life is hard. Especially when life is hard. Show up with extra kindness and compassion for yourself, allowing it (whatever it is for you) to look as different as you are from day to day.

Hugs & Hi-Fives,

Christa

PS- This is the first time I have written something like this since 2020. Thanks for reading. I hope to continue to share my thoughts and insights here, when it feels good to me. (wink)

Allow it to Change